Since forever, I considered people who nap after lunch to be Old. Slippers, blanket, snoring in front of the TV kind of old. That is, until a few months ago, when I found myself slowly crossing over to the nap side. I’m ashamed to admit it, but I now nap during the day. Voluntarily. Repeatedly. Enthusiastically (well, until I wake up).
In my case, I’d like to blame age more than geography. Although I did move to Spain, where, according to urban legend and possibly some actual data, half the country naps after lunch. Maybe it’s contagious. Or maybe I just hit 45 and my body decided the post-lunch hours are best spent unconscious.
This sudden wave of exhaustion that hits me right after lunch is impossible to fight. It’s not a sleepy feeling — it’s full shutdown mode. And since I work from home, the temptation to “just lie down for a moment” is right there. Of course, it starts with good intentions — a short, restorative power nap. But let’s be honest, it never is.
To be fair, even people working in offices aren’t immune. My brother-in-law works in a very serious London office and has proudly taken 15-minute naps in the toilet for years. And he functions like a normal human being! Meanwhile, I lie down in bed, fall asleep like a baby, and wake up two hours later with drool on my pillow and no idea what year it is.
I know all the nap rules — 5 to 15 minutes is the golden window. Anything more, and you risk becoming a zombie. But how can I wake up after just 5 minutes when it takes me at least that long to stop thinking about whether I should be napping in the first place? So instead, I wake up two hours later, stiff-necked and confused, with a negative energy balance and the personality of a walking dead.
I’ve tried everything to nap “responsibly.” I’ve set alarms. I’ve tried the infamous “coffee nap” (drink a coffee and then lie down — apparently the caffeine kicks in just as you wake up?). I even tried napping sitting upright like I’m meditating, which just made me look like a passed-out yoga instructor.
So here I am. A woman in her mid-forties, trying to function, nap, and still get things done. I haven’t mastered the art of the power nap yet, but I’ve certainly mastered the full-blown afternoon coma. Maybe one day I’ll get it right. For now, I’ll be over here, asleep at 2 p.m., dreaming about having more energy and less drool.
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