I have no time for anything. I mean anything.
It doesn’t matter if I work full-time (or more) in London with a 1.5 hour commute each way, or if I’m unemployed and living in Spain—what I’m always lacking most is the Time.
Something is wrong with me. It must be my age, some midlife crisis knocking, because when I compare my life now to ten years ago, logically, I should have twice the free time.
My son is much older now, so he needs less of my attention. My husband is older, so he’s more self-sufficient. I no longer have a daily commute. I don’t have a full-time job anymore. I’m a better cook, so I spend less time in the kitchen. I have less sex. I don’t get hungover as often (which used to waste a lot of time and energy). I see friends less, I go out less, and instead of meeting up, I mostly just talk to them on the phone. I even masturbate much faster.
So where the fuck is my time?!
I wish I had time for long walks during the day, evenings with enough space to read for an hour and watch my favourite TV series for two. I wish I could experiment with new Ottolenghi dishes in my kitchen, have endless talks with my best friend, and still have the time (and desire) for sex under the stars in the garden. I want long shopping trips—actual clothes shopping, not groceries.
Even now I must rush!
What the fuck???!!!
Comments